Afraid of Making the Wrong Move? Here’s Why Any Choice Can Be the Right One.
Has it ever happened to you that you can’t make a decision because you’re afraid of making the wrong one? You are not alone in this; many of my clients have expressed similar concerns, and I’m here to help you navigate them.
I used to be in this exact place — from “Should I quit my job?” to “When should I quit my job? Is March too early?” to “Should I shoot for a vertical or lateral move?” to “Where should I live?”
More often than not, we don’t end up taking any action because we’re too afraid of making the “wrong” move or a mistake, so we get stuck in this limbo of “What should I do?”
This is what we call “decision paralysis” — being so afraid of making the “wrong” decision that we end up making no decision at all.
My clients tell me, “I want to pick a goal and move toward it. I don’t want to be sprinting in the wrong direction only to find out I need to come all the way back to the starting line.”
To that, I reassure my clients that they will never be starting at the same starting line. And I would tell you the same. Why? Because thanks to that “wrong” direction, you will not be the same person. You will be more equipped with lessons, experiences, connections, and confidence you gained along the way. You will literally not be the same person. That is the fruit of having been brave, trying something uncomfortable, being in the unknown, and embracing the possibility of mistakes.
One of my favourite exercises that I do with my clients is asking them to ask themselves, “Even if I totally failed, what will I walk away with?” After answering this:
They realize the worst probably isn’t going to happen.
They recognize their own resourcefulness to come up with solutions to these worst-cast scenarios.
They walk away with much more confidence and reassurance that they got this.
When you spell out the issue, put it into words and take time to look at it, it suddenly becomes smaller and more manageable than how it seemed in the head — inflated and overwhelming.
So my advice is to pick a direction. Any direction, if you can already see some benefits — especially if you’re between your top two choices (or your only two options). Sit with your options. Give it some space. Then pick one, run with it, and do your best. Don’t dwell on it so much that you end up going nowhere. At the end of the day, not making a decision or delaying one is a decision in and of itself.
I’m not saying it will be all smooth sailing from there. There will be U-turns. There will be sharp turns. There will be missed exits. But there will also be points where you realize you are just where you are meant to be for your own unique journey — and all the dots will connect in retrospect. That is how you trust the process.
So don’t be afraid to choose the “wrong” path. You will never know how you would have felt or what you would have learned if you chose the other path. But by choosing a path and getting a move on — even if you realize you need to change course — you will have learned something about yourself, life, others, and the issue at hand. Plus, you will gain more clarity on what to do next. Sitting at home and ruminating won’t get you there.
When in doubt, think about the value you’ll create. How will this choice make someone else’s life a little bit better without harming another entity along the way?
Also, before moving on to the next step, give yourself space to breathe. Instead of filling your mind with rumination or filling your time with constant action, take time each day to sit with the discomfort of not knowing. Sometimes, the space itself can do wonders — letting answers come to you naturally. Meditation or Yoga Nidra can be powerful for this.
There are plenty of resources on podcast apps that can guide you to focus on the here and now.
Or check out the Yoga Philosophy course if you want to learn it in depth so that you can practice it on your own moving forward.
Or reach out to me for private sessions to learn how to mediate.
Let the magic unfold!
Pause, decide, get a move on, and set a date to reassess if you need to make a turn, exit, or keep going.
You got this!
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If you want to know read more about decision making:
More on getting unstuck:
The Plunger Theory
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With love,
S